Sexuality is one of the most polarizing and hotly-debated topics, not just in Christianity, but throughout the world. Many people choose whether or not to follow Jesus based on how Christianity addresses any number of sexual topics. Why is this so important to mankind? Probably because God created us as sexual beings, with very innate urges. As if that wasn’t enough, we are hyper-bombarded by everything from perfume ads to TV shows to pornography all aimed at stirring up sexual lust for the sake of views, clicks, and the all-powerful dollar.
Christianity seems to have two fairly polarized reactions to living in a sex-saturated era: silencing all talk of it until it becomes practically taboo, or treating it so lightly it runs rampant and unchecked within the church. Neither response is right, of course; God doesn’t want us ignorant about sexual matters or themes—have you read Song of Solomon??—but He wants us to honor the sanctity of the subject, not to treat it as a byword, a curse, or something we can dabble in lightly without repercussion.
Why is sex so important to God? It is a supernaturally binding, joining, captivating act that impacts a person on multiple levels including physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual—whether they want to acknowledge it or not. We may not even be aware of all the ways sexual acts impact us, but God is very clear: the bond exists between two sexually-joined people, and it does have ramifications when handled too lightly OR too heavily.
As Christians, we cannot afford to play loosely with the topic of sexuality, nor can we afford to run from it—and we serve no one by making it “off limits”. It is a part of the Creator’s design for us, and it was meant to be a gift handled with care and respect.
It’s up to us to bring the healing light of that fact to a world that is, like it or not, sexually awakened.
What is Sexuality?
Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines sexuality as “the quality or state of being sexual; of, relating to, or associated with sex or the sexes.”
“Sexuality” has also lately become a hot-topic term for one’s sexual preferences, but for the sake of this blog, we’ll stick to discussing the broader term of sexuality. God has plenty to say about the topic of sex—far, far more than this two-pager can cover—but it behooves the born-again Christian or really anyone searching for sexual truth to explore the Scriptures themselves pertaining to this subject. And not just read, but ponder; why does God set such firm boundaries with sexual conduct? Why does the subject matter SO much to Him? If God takes sexual matters so seriously, shouldn’t we? What does God, in His infinite wisdom, know about the benefits and risks of sexuality that our mortal minds simply can’t fathom? And how do we each individually need to correct our stance on the matter of sexuality to be in line with His?
What Does the Bible Say About Sexuality?
1 Corinthians 6:18 – Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-4 – For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor…
Matthew 19:4-6 – He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh.
How Should I Conduct Myself Sexually?
The first step to proper sexual conduct is to understand what the Bible defines as proper; what it says about sex inside and outside of marriage, what is permissible and what isn’t in the eyes of God. Then we need to take note of what compulsions in us might implore us to act outside that conduct. Is there a desperation for intimacy? A desire to be wanted? A need for thrill and adventure? A wound in the past that hasn’t fully healed?
To be clear, having desires is not a sin; but we have to be very, very circumspect about our behavior and whether we rule our urges or they rule us. If we are relating to any matter of sexuality in a way that is discordant with God’s word, we need to take proper steps—even drastic ones—to return to alignment with God’s will.
It’s worth noting that sexual immorality is a kind of misconduct we’re told to flee from (1 Cor. 6:18). This is because what takes place sexually between two people is a profound and powerful binding, and when it takes place outside of healthy contexts it can absolutely detract from someone’s focus on the spiritual and harm their ability to serve God in a way other sins can’t.
God is not at all surprised that when it comes to matters of sexuality and sexual conduct, there is an almost inherent weakness in mankind. Some sins are even compared to or addressed through sexual euphemism to emphasize their attraction, such as witchcraft, disobedience, etc. God sets very clear, very firm boundaries about sexual behavior that is healthy and good for both parties involved.
The good news is, when approached with respect to God’s boundaries and instructions, sex is a wonderful, natural, healthy and pure experience. It’s not something filthy to be avoided, nor should people feel guilty or shameful for being sexual beings. But like with anything else we are and anything we do, this wonderful gift should be viewed and engaged only within the laws God has laid out; this guarantees the ultimate physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits of the act.
Is there a place in your life where you find yourself tempted into sexual misconduct? What steps can you take TODAY to flee that temptation?